Five Years of Writing

Posted on May 27, 2016 by Elizabeth

To hear my blog post read aloud, just click the play button. If you’re reading this in an email, you may have to click here to hear the post on my site.

Five years.

Five years of writing in this space.

Much has happened in five years.

Our family has moved.

We have doubled our number of children.

We have lost loved ones and gained many more.

My writing has improved; I grow more and more into my own writing-self as I write each week.

My blog has grown, slowly rather than by giant leaps and I find that this is how it should be. I am, after all, a mommy to four very little girls.

I find that I am content with my smallness, content simply to write with no expectations for more. Yet sometimes I wonder if God is calling me to more.

It is a fine balance, this staying content. To not feel greedy for more while also not being fearful of the same possibility. How well I achieve this high wire act depends on my day and how much sleep I had the night before.

In honor of this five year mark, and in preparation for sending out my book to be read and judged, next week I will begin a quest for more subscribers, a quest in which I hope you will join me. (It will involve giveaways…a few of my favorite things!)

Perhaps God has more public spaces prepared for these words I write; perhaps He desires for me to continue writing for just a few. While I suspect that I will feel a bit of relief if smallness is His choice, I only want to remain faithful to Him.

In the meantime, and regardless of the result, I will continue to practice my art, being faithful to cultivate whatever talent has been given. I will continue to learn how to craft my words, enjoying the beauty of weaving words and visual art together and enjoying the search for wisdom and understanding that I pray lies beneath my weavings. I will continue to explore this small life around me as well as the larger culture of the world in an attempt to love God better.

I will write, as I have written every week for five years, of the way that God makes all things sacred. I hope that you will continue with me and I pray that you will be helped by these words.

As I end every blogging year, I finish with this prayer:

Whatever the reason for my writing, here I am in this space. I will continue to obey, even though it is hard and often causes my heart to feel fear. I will write. God will listen. I pray He will continue to be pleased.

The Word

Posted on April 29, 2016 by Elizabeth

To hear my blog post read aloud, just click the play button. If you’re reading this in an email, you may have to click here to hear the post on my site.

In the beginning, God spoke.

God spoke His Word and Word created.

God’s Word created sun and moon, trees and sea grass, sparrows and lions.

Nothing exists that was not created through Him.

In the beginning was the Word.

God’s Word created man.

He created man and then God’s Word became a man. He put on flesh and dwelt among us.

The Word incarnate.

The Word came so that the incarnation can continue, so that our lives can become incarnate, the whole of life an incarnation of the Word.

The Word taught us, He showed us how to love and how to live.

God’s Word is a lamp to our feet and a light to our path while we live on this earth.

The Word came to be light, to shine in the darkness. To be the way so we can know how to go.

He spoke words for us to hear and was the Word for us to see. He was the words He spoke because we are simple and slow and need more than one way to comprehend.

Someday we will no longer need the sun for the Word will be our lamp in the new Jerusalem.

The Word will be our lamp and so we will know the way, will remain in the way.

The Word is light and the Word is love, and the Word shows us that love knows no bounds.

All while teaching by example, the Word gave Himself up for us.

The Word gave Himself so that we can know love. The Word gave Himself so that we can be love.

The Word is in the beginning and the Word is in the end and the Word holds all the in-between together.

In Him is life.

Four Years of Writing

Posted on May 22, 2015 by Elizabeth

I have been writing here in this space for four years now.

Four years of writing and hitting “publish” once a week, every week.

Four years is a long time in the world of blogs. Not many make it this long.

To be honest, just last month I was afraid I would have to take a break.

This fourth baby has been, well, difficult.

This year of beginning to homeschool and being pregnant and then caring for an extra fussy newborn has threatened to sink me at times.

Since I couldn’t give back the baby (don’t worry…I didn’t really want to…mostly…except every once in a while at two in the morning…) or quit educating my child or let my house return to nature, it seemed as though my writing was the only thing I could let go.

Except that God wouldn’t allow me to let it go. There was always something in my heart that He wanted me to say.

Often it was pounded out in five minute spaces and published even though it didn’t feel polished or very well crafted. Yet every time I was obedient to hit that publish button, even when I felt the most inadequate, I heard back from someone about how those words were exactly what they needed to hear.

So I keep writing.

I keep writing and I keep publishing in this little space of mine.

Except it isn’t really mine, is it?

It belongs to God and has always belonged to God, so as long as He keeps asking me to write, even when I don’t have the time to perfectly craft each word to make it sing, I will continue to obey.

Someday I’ll have more time. Someday these little ones won’t be quite so dependent on me and I’ll be able to pursue those bigger writing dreams of mine.

Until then, I’ll be faithful in this season of my life. I’ll hold those tiny, sturdy, beautiful bodies extra close and then snatch a few minutes here and there to jot down what I have in my heart. I’ll enjoy this season of writing in between nursing and playing dollhouse and reading aloud.

I hope you’ll continue to read and be encouraged, even when the words don’t flow as well as they used to.

I’m grateful that God has chosen me to be their mommy and I’m grateful that God has chosen me to write in this space.

So here is where I live: trying my best to be faithful in all that God has given me.

I will end this year, as I have each year of blogging, with this:

Whatever the reason for my writing, here I am in this space. I will continue to obey, even though it is hard and often causes my heart to feel fear. I will write. God will listen. I pray He will continue to be pleased.

Three Years of Writing

Posted on May 16, 2014 by Elizabeth

Three years.

Much can happen in that amount of time. Much has happened.

There has been life and there has been death. There have been a few acceptances and many rejections. There has been writing and rewriting and yet rewriting again of a book. There has been much learning and much reading and much perfecting of my craft.

Much can also remain the same in that amount of time.

I still discipline myself to write almost every day. I still polish enough words to publish in this space once a week. I still believe that I am in a season of very little ones where I am waiting, practicing and learning and refining my art.

Another element that remains the same is my fear. I am learning that no matter how long I have been writing, it is still a frightening thing to release my words, that deeply vulnerable piece of myself, into a world that seems increasingly venomous. I am also learning that no matter how much encouragement I get, I am still mostly convinced that my skill is substandard, clumsy, inept.

I am grateful when someone says that I spoke to them, that my words helped to heal or encourage their heart. I am reminded that, as much as I may sometimes desire to reach the many, God is concerned with the particular. One is as important as the whole.

I get restless at times. I find myself chasing after something in the world of writing instead of just diligently writing and waiting on God, and I have to ask Him to reign me back in. I want to spend time at writing conferences. I want to publish my book. I want to have my articles accepted into magazines and journals. I want to write epically and impact the world for God.

Yet most of the time I am content with what God gives to me. For truly, I am not ready for much responsibility and must continue to show myself faithful with the little that I am given. I am content to put in the time so that I can learn how to make my words sing. I am content to continue to read and study so that I have the substance to place within those words that will sing. I am content to dwell in this moment, this moment in which my little ones are so very little, which won’t last for always.

So here I am. Three years later. Much has changed. Much has remained the same.

One fundamental that has not changed? The One I am writing for. And so, once again, I will end as I began:

Whatever the reason for my writing, here I am in this space. I will continue to obey, even though it is hard and often causes my heart to feel fear. I will write. God will listen. I pray He will continue to be pleased.

Breathe

Posted on March 21, 2014 by Elizabeth

He knelt down, leaned in close, and

breathed into the dust.

Dust became man and man

breathed in His image and life.

He breathed His Word and

Word gained skin and

breathed life into twelve who then

breathed that life into more.

Spirit became fire and

breathed mighty wind into

hearts and minds which then

breathed change into the world.

We breathe a human breath then

slip under the waters where

all breath stops and when

we come up we now have His

breath in our souls.

One day our lungs will

breathe last breath and we fall

asleep but when we wake we

find Him leaning close and He

breathes into us perfect life.

Why I Want To Join

Posted on October 5, 2012 by Elizabeth

I am a logophile, a lover of words. I love the way that different words evoke different emotions, and even when two words have the same dictionary meaning, they can still have very different connotations.

I love searching for just the right word that paints exactly the picture I want so that others can see what is in my mind.

Every Friday, I get a writing prompt. Just one word, to challenge me to write for five minutes without editing. Just to practice my craft, to practice being able to find exactly the right words. A few Fridays ago, the word was “join”.

Join.

My heart was immediately flooded with emotion, just from that one simple word. Everything from sadness and self-doubt in remembering times I was not asked to join, to desire and longing to join…anything.

What is it about that word? Why does it evoke so much emotion?

It makes me want to belong, want to be a part of something. Not just anything, although there is a part of me that might want to belong to anything, but to be a part of something that really matters.

I want to join, to be an important part of an important group that is…I don’t know, changing the world?

It almost seems a bit ludicrous, that a such small, simple word can pull such complex feeling out of me. As I thought a bit more about it, though, I realized that this is probably something that God put into all of us.

I wonder if God has placed a strong desire to join, to belong, to be a part of something, into each of our hearts in order to draw us closer both to Him and to each other and the community He has placed each of us in.

Yes, this is a difficult thing and involves risk and vulnerability on our part. Yet, as I wrote last week, it is God asking us to do what He has already done.

Perhaps, if we who follow Christ can find the courage to also follow Christ’s example of opening our hearts to those around us, then God will use that desire to join, to belong, that He has placed into all of our hearts to draw those He is pursuing into His community.

I will pray for courage. I will open my eyes to discover those to whom God is asking me to open my heart. I will trust God’s Spirit to do the rest.

Will you join me?

A Plea for a Different Sort of Compliment

Posted on April 20, 2012 by Elizabeth

Today is going to be a bit different.

One small difference is that I’m not going to use pictures. As you read on, perhaps you’ll understand why.

The main difference?

Usually, I write about things that have a fairly wide range of interest for people rather than writing for parents or musicians or thirty-four-year-old women who love art and logic.

Today, though, I feel as though God is asking me to speak directly to my women friends. To be honest, I’ve actually been avoiding this essay for a while. I’ve found, though that it’s usually best not to disobey God.
To my men friends: please don’t go away. Keep reading if you like and hear some things that could teach you how to better love all of the women in your life.

The impetus for these thoughts was a conversation I overheard at a Hearts at Home conference last month.

Yes, I was eavesdropping. It’s a really bad habit of mine. My darling husband has tried his best to break me of it, but people always have such interesting things to say! I can’t help being curious about people I see.

The two women were talking about a marathon that one of them had just completed. My own thought was “Wow! That’s impressive. What discipline and what an amazing accomplishment.”

The comment of her companion? “Wow! No wonder you’re as skinny as a stick!”

My heart grew just a bit heavy as I glanced back at them.

May I say something here in this space that we don’t talk about much, if ever? Something that is a really hard thing because this place in our hearts is so very sore and tender?

All of the women I know, with whom I have spoken about these things, struggle with their body image.

All.

Small, large, tall, little, plain or stunning by this world’s standards…all.

If you do not and never have struggled with this, you are in a blessed minority. I am so grateful that you have not had to hurt over this. Will you keep reading so you can know how to help the rest of us?

Sweet friends. Our world, our culture, screams at us that we should look a certain way, that our bodies should be a certain shape. Most of us (all of us?), at the least, go through periods where we do not like what we see in the mirror.

Some of us never like what we see.

With our world forcing impossible images in front of our hearts and minds, could we, as sisters in Christ, vow to stop talking to each other in the manner I overheard? Could we stop complimenting each other on how skinny we are and bragging about how little we eat?

Could we, instead, praise each other for working hard at a difficult task, for doing yet another week’s laundry for our family, for working on the fruit of self-control, for spending a little extra time with God yesterday?

Yes, we should take care of our bodies. Yes, we should encourage each other to eat well and exercise so as to stay healthy and to have enough energy to accomplish the tasks that God sets before us.

But could we please stop reinforcing our culture’s obsession with the size of our waists?

We seem to think, and to communicate to each other, that we are made beautiful by what we do or don’t do, rather than by the simple fact that God made us.

To paraphrase James: my sisters, this should not be! We are called to be different, to speak God’s truth to each other.

Out of love for each other, out of love for your sister who is struggling to see herself as a beautiful work of God, could we all promise to choose different compliments?

The words that we use with each other can either reinforce our culture’s perspective that we are how we look or our God’s view that we are beautiful because He made us.

My beautiful sisters (and you amazing men who stuck with me!), will you choose to be mindful of how you speak? Will you promise to use words that encourage rather than words that make us want to either run into a darkened room to hide God’s amazing creation or to take sinful pride in what we have accomplished in our own strength?

If you wish, we could use the comment space as a safe place to talk about this subject. We have only kind words and compassionate hearts here.